Much of what is advertised today as self care is the result of clever marketing. Put “self care” into the Pinterest search engine, for example, and half of what you see is product placement. This represents a co-opting of the term by businesses, obscuring it's original meaning. Don’t get me wrong - things like manicures, baths, and skincare routines all have their place in my life! But I categorize them as beauty rituals…not self care.
Because self care is work. It is often difficult and uncomfortable work.
Self care is taking some deep breaths before responding to something upsetting. Self care is scheduling a dental cleaning every 6 months and making sure your pap or your prostate exam is up to date. Self care is getting that thing checked out, even if you’re scared. Self care is going to therapy (of course I’m going to say that - come on! At least I didn’t put it first!). Self care is having a difficult conversation you’ve been putting off for fear of how the other person will react. Self care is confronting your procrastination, perfectionism, or avoidance. Self care is 2 liters of water a day. Self care is limiting screen time an hour before bed. Self care is reducing caffeine. Self care is exercising and proper nutrition, even when you don’t feel like it. Even when it’s very, very hard. Because self care is an act of investment. You are investing in your entire self – physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. It goes beyond what feels relaxing.
While there will always be a place for comfort and relaxation (and believe me…my life is full of both) acts of self care are something more than that. Self care pushes us to do right by ourselves. So, together, let’s architect a new paradigm for the care we invite upon the self. After all – doesn’t our dear self deserve it?